After reading my partner Cameron's blog, I checked to see when the last time I blogged was. March 22. Hmmm...found out about the Hep B and screached to a stop. I could make noises about exhaustion, business, still working two jobs, and maintaining supervision to complete licensure requirements. And with Cameron in need of surgery, picking up extra housework as necessary. So I can justify not blogging. But honesty compels me to say I play zoo, so I can realistically make time for a blog post.
Truth is, I feel like I'm holding my breath. We are poised on radical change, and it's just not happening fast enough. We wait, each day, for that change to come. And it could have come anytime in the last 18 months or anytime in the next 18. That's the biggest challenge. We know what's coming, more or less, but not when.
As my name suggests, Dreamweaver, I am dreaming. Cameron and I want to move to a small town in the mountains of Oregon. We dream of fruit orchards, bee keeping, aquaponics, goats, chickens and rabbits. A world vastly different than a trailer park in South Carolina. Cameron dreams of transitioning. To walking into circle without a shirt on, neatly trimmed beard, embodying the Lord. I dream of that same circle with apple blossoms woven into a garland on my head. And late nights by the river with a fire, talking.
To prepare for the future, I research. I come from farm stock. I picked berries at five for Mammaw Rosemary to make into a pie. I hoed, raked, and weeded. I gathered windfall apples for applesauce. So I've been researching long term storage wheat berries. Fruit trees and nut trees that are cold hardy. Pollination and self-pollination. How to pollinate citrus in my future conservatory. I've researched breeds of goats and agreed with Cameron on the Nigerian Dwarf and found the breeder.
I dream of working the land gently, with raised flower beds, aquaponic veggies, ever bearing berries and trees. I dream of walking the land, the woods, beside the river. I want to blog, to think, to take the exploratory path of the inner journey. I want to reclaim my place as the child of the Goddess, her priestess and servant.
I read a lot. I see the growing economic crisis and global crisis and want to make a difference one blossom, one prayer, one apple at a time. Ever cut an apple crossways to observe the Lady's pentagram? She is ever present. Her voice in the wind and fall of snow.
So if one particle of dust, one flap of a butterfly wing, creates change, then so can I. Even if it means I'm simply removing my own carbon footprint and providing the neighbor with extra apples. Yes, I want to simplify. And create. Looking for pictures, I found this lovely blog. I want to read more blogs. Return to my photography and jewelry making. Learn to draw. Create forms in 3-D with clay. I want to post pictures of our goats. The peaches in bloom. My first handpicked cherries. I want to live in the joy of creation. And have time and sleep enough to treasure them. And to share it all with Cameron. This is my dream, and weaving of my path. So mote it be.